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Dear Janice

with the roof suddenly in worse shape, “structural damage” and my totaled car I need more, you know than any continuing education class can pay for poetry and fiction for three weeks and you could use a break from New York City ice. Listen, we'll start with something like EST— you know how they stopped…

Family Portrait

“Sutton,” my wife says, “the girls won't wash between their legs.” What am I supposed to do about it? I think, having just come in from buying round steak that I will try to tenderize with a mallet, then salt and pepper, dredge in flour and fry and serve with green peas, biscuits, gravy. But…

Confession

The Nazi within me thinks it's time to take charge. The world's a mess; people are crazy. The Nazi within me wants the windows shut tight, new locks put on the doors. There's too much fresh air, too much coming and going. The Nazi within me wants to be boss of traffic and traffic lights….

The Boss & His Beauty

The man with the muscles      He'll kill her Naw, he just ‘instructs' her      Opera operate. Opt. Opponents. He-man lift her up and slam her down      Will she land on her ass or spine? Hand-become-hammer      He gonna break her neck some time No matter how many or whose side      Bludgeons. Do harm, make cry. Plow ponies…

161286

Whenever I am leafing through a book and come upon a      single hair, for a moment I believe it belongs to the author, and that the book, too, is still the author's, and I must      give it back. Then I come to my senses. Usually, it is just a hair from a      mustache, and then…